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The challenge of balance.

Friday 19 August 2011

Wednesday was really good. It was so great to spend time adoring God and praying in the project which is right in the middle of a community which is filled with so much darkness and hopelessness. After making some lunch (I was quite impressed with the fact that I managed to make rice the Brazilian way without burning it) we headed out to do some visits to families. My heart get so burdened with their situations. One family has 6 children and the father was sat talking badly about them in front of us. One of the boys went outside and sat crying. It’s hard to know how to deal with it. But it makes me so angry when parents do that, and it really makes me ask how it is possible to see a restoration both of the parents and the children. Most of the parents treat their children the way they were treated and when you add survival to it, it really isn’t easy...

On our wanderings around the community, mostly listening to the families talk, but also praying, I bumped into Carliane’s brother, Fransico. Oh how my heart broke! Tall and skinny (he’s grown so much since I worked with him 4 ½ years ago). He is 17 now. He waved at me and I asked him how he was doing. His response was “Igual da minha māe” (the same as my mother). His mother died about 4 years ago. She was a hard core crack addict and at 40 looked 70. He lived with her and felt a tremendous responsibility for her. After she died he continued in the community... and is not trapped in the same deadly cycle as she was. Addicted to crack and will end up just like her if nothing happens. He said he wanted to change and agreed that he had to want to for any change to happen. Whether or not he was really serious about changing remains to be seen... it’ll be good to check up on him when I’m there. But most of all to pray. Stand in the gap for him and pray that a miracle can happen like it did for his sister Carliane (who is doing really well and I am hoping to go see her one of these days).

The last few evenings I’ve been involved with ENVIA which is the night school run by YWAM for people from local churches. It’s a discipleship type programme with lectures 3 evenings as week and small groups in that. They have a group of 50+ students who are all so hungry for more of God. It’s really inspiring and gives me hope that the church is awake and God is working in hearts. I’ve sat in on a few classes, helped lead a little group in intercession and mostly prayed. It’ll be good to continue to be involved and see how that goes.

But with all of this I realised today that my time is filling up so quickly. And I haven’t even gone to the youth prisons yet, or visited the project with the pregnant teens... When you take into account that these “activities” also involve a 70 minute drive each way, it’s easy to see how the days are just flying by. And I don’t want to be so busy I don’t have time to be in the prayer room as well.

So today I am trying to create a bit of balance.

This morning I went out really early and got a manicure and pedicure (which is so cheap here) and now I feel like I’m getting settled. Probably all Brazilian women have their nails done, so now I am getting into the culture more.

Anyways, I got a ride to Aquiraz and took the bus back. It was fun to get the bus, and when I got off the lady who lives in the house in front of the farm walked with me and we had a good chat. Back here I’ve spent the day pretty much in the prayer room and just trying to not be so busy. In a bit I’m going to pop up to Selma so we can pray together. I was starting to feel quite rushed and so busy (starting early and getting to bed late), so it’s good to find balance. Tomorrow I’m taking a day off. Going to clean the house and then head into Fortaleza to shop a few things. Sunday and Monday aren’t super scheduled so I want to make a good schedule for the week ahead so I can have balance, yet really make the most of every day I’m here.

So yeah, right now I’m at peace. I’m sat in the office. Outside I hear the crickets. Inside the mosquitoes are flying around (I guess I’ll find out if my insect repellent works) and a little while ago there was a flying cockroach here, but he’s disappeared. All reminders that I’m in Brazil.

If you pray. Please keep praying for me!

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