Today I've been really really tired all day. I guess it's part of life and also part of getting ready to leave. Today I dragged myself out of bed, and had a cup of tea to get going. And when the mum we were taking to see her son in prison wasn't in, the morning went doing bits and pieces. This afternoon we were at the bussterminal to see the streetkids. It was a good time I guess, but the group of kids there at the moment are really just so lost. Totally drugged, dirty, and don't really care about anything. It's like they've lost all innocence. When I got back I looked through a few past reports getting them ready to do the monthly overview of the kids we've met this month. I felt really sad. One kid said her dream was that her mum would stop drinking, another girl told of a stepfather who molested her and her sisters, and another boy told of how his dad would hit his sister. And I am left with the question of: where is the hope and future for these kids? Some of them I have known for many years, and now I am leaving, and they are still on the streets. I mean, I am a firm believer in that we probably rarely will see all the results of what we've done, but I still wonder... what will become of them? And then I remember the boys on the farm. And that gives me hope and makes me smile.
I sat waiting for the train while drinking chocolate milk and eating what we call solbolle for lunch (which is a large cinnamon roll with custard in the middle). My heart was overflowing with gratitude and love, and such a deep sense of fellowship and “family”. I’d spent the morning drinking coffee at my old job at Crux , catching up with all the amazing people that make that fellowship and sense of togetherness what it is. Since many are fully vaccinated I got to give and receive quite a few good hugs. Hugs that communicate so much more than one can put into words. It was strange being back after 4.5 months, and yet it felt so very normal. Conversations on deeper levels, sharing victories and joys, and putting into words the good we see in each other, filled my heart until there was simply no more room. Waiting for the train it felt like my heart was overflowing. My new job is great. I love the team I work with, enjoy the challenges, and feel humbled by the privilege of being invited...